Matthew

Writing Matthew’s blog fell to me (see Jan 08 for Becky’s blog about Anna). Why me? Well, partly because I haven’t written much (which might be the reason why you’ve kept reading), partly because I really want to. But also I find myself more and more thinking, “I bet I was like that as a kid.” So there’s some sense of common understanding. This is good, but at times not a little frightening. How would you like to see the oddities of your personality played out in a two year old body with two year old concerns?

I re-read Becky’s blog about Anna to see what she said. It went something like, Anna is doing this, saying that, going here, coming there. Whatever is in her little head comes out, at times loudly. The uniqueness of Matthew, however, is that it is not so much what he does, but what he thinks. But the thing is, we’re not really sure exactly what he thinks. Things just come out from time to time. We’re only seeing the tip of the iceberg.

For instance, at dusk today we were walking down a side street that overlooked the lake, when Matthew blurted out, “all dogs go to sleep,” from the book Go Dogs. Go! We haven’t read that book recently, but the going to sleep seems to have stuck. Anytime anything reminds him of night time, he says recites from the book, followed by pretending to go to sleep and pretending to snore (It’s really cute). We just got past the, blue-car-crashed-but-the-red-car-helped-him stage, which seemed to have lasted for months. At the dinner table while Becky and I were sharing our thoughts for the day, Matthew would blurt out in complete seriousness his plot summary from the movie Cars. He would continue to repeat this summary until we acknowledged his contribution and responded appropriately. So we wonder, how much during the day is he thinking about the red car and the blue car? Apparently a lot, because I’d open the door to his room to get him in the morning to be greeted by the plot of the movie Cars.

But he’s not just absorbing things and then spitting them out. It seems he’s really interacting with his world. Matthew has been sick intermittently since we’ve arrived, most recently with an ear infection. Matthew had fallen asleep on the couch while watching Cars (for the 87^th time), when he was awoken suddenly by a giant fly landing on the side of his face. I suspect that during his nap his ear infection had reached a pain threshold that it really bothered him. He thusly drew the (wrong) conclusion that the fly—which he called a bee—had caused the pain in his ear.

So Matthew was terrified of bees, the sight of bees, or the thought of bees. He would respond by holding his ear and saying, “no bee, no bee.” Becky, who has a lot of wisdom in this area, taught him what has come to be know as the Matthew catechism. It goes like this:

Question 1:

Q: Who made bees?

A: God made bees.

Question 2:

Q: Who takes care of Matthew?

A: God takes care of Matthew.

Amazingly, this really seemed to work. Our language teacher was greeted one day by Matthew running out of the bedroom saying, “No bee, no bee, God made bees.”

Matthew also interacts with his world with a healthy dose of creativity. He rides his plastic tricycle all over the house. One day when we told him it was time for nap, he suggested, “nap on bike.” (I’m probably one of the few fathers who could honestly tell him that I’ve tried taking a nap on a bike and it doesn’t work very well). Matthew loves to play blocks. He’ll make something which he will call an animal (his pronunciation: mamel). When we ask him what animal it is he thinks for a minute and then gives an answer (Zebra, horse, and dog are his favorite). We have a book about Noah and the Ark. I’ve never read it because it is in Spanish (the last thing I need is another langue), but it has a picture of Noah on the front with a white curly beard that hangs off his chin. Matthew knows the whole Noah story. But there are two things that he’s really focused on. First, God told Noah to build a big boat (That’s our cue to add, “And Noah obeyed God.”). Second, apparently Noah has a beard. Out of the blue Matthew will put something on his chin and inform us that he is Noah, “Look, I Noah.”

Speaking of stories, Matthew has a very high capacity for repetition (or at least a good bit higher than Becky’s). He will ask for the same story over and over and over again. We started with the Baby Jesus story, to which we’ve added several others. In light of Easter, we told Him about Jesus’ death and resurrection. Matthew labeled this story the, “Jesus hurt story.” It is interesting when we get to the part about Jesus dying on the cross and that it really hurt Jesus, Matthew identifies something that hurts him.

Add to this a strong emotional intensity (okay, so he’s not entirely like me). Matthew gives big hugs or little hugs, no in-between. The animals are big or small. Even if he knew the world for middle, I doubt he would use it. Lately, Matthew has either laughed hysterically or cried—and maybe even both at the same time.

That’s our Matthew, and we love him.

Easter Sunday

Here are some pics of our first Easter overseas.

I managed to keep the tradition of dying eggs thanks to a friend passing along a dye kit (I totally overlooked liquid food coloring when packing.) Matthew enjoyed watching me dye the eggs while he stuck the stickers that came with the dye all up and down his arms.

We had a special time remembering what Christ did for us through His death and resurrection. Matthew has been learning Bible stories one by one, and now the "Jesus hurt story" is part of his collection. We worshipped together with some friends, and shared a meal together (BBQ, chips, deviled eggs, etc.)

Of course, it wouldn't be Easter without the dress, right? During our photo shoot we learned that Matthew is able to smile on demand....

...when bribed with candy!

Have It Your Way...

We went to Burger King two days a go and I observed an interesting economic phenomenon: the price is a little more expensive than what we would find in the states, but as our kids roam around the tables people give them free french fries. So we pretty much break even.

My new hobby--laundry. Actually, I've really grown to enjoy hanging out our laundry. It's warm and sunny on the back balcony in the morning. The kids love to play out there while I do it, so it is usually a peaceful and content moment (a valuable thing in life with two toddlers). It looks so orderly, especially if I hang the socks in matching pairs. And when it's dry, if I have time, I like to fold it as I take it down, watching all the goings on of the city from the balcony. I wasn't so enthusiastic about the whole process in the fall, though, when cold, wet weather meant it could take days for some things to dry... but now that it's spring, it's wonderful.

Mike's been really focusing on vocabulary recently, and he's reaping good results. One of the words he's picked up is the word for twins, and it seems like now I constantly am asked if my kids are twins. Of course I say that they aren't. But it's gotten me thinking, and I think that for the last several months I've often mistaken the question "are they twins" for "is [child] a girl?" Oops. I thought it seemed odd that so many people thought Matthew might be a girl.

Shopping

We went to a new Pazar today. It reminded me that a few people have asked how shopping is different here. Well, I’d say there are three basic types of shopping I’ve done. The first is in stores that are fairly similar to stores we would find back in Harford County. There are two malls with stores that are a lot like WalMart or Target. Ok, there are a few differences. The Walmart-like store has a full-service fish department (that you can sometimes smell from the front of the store). Its employees wear rollerskates—it’s quite a sight to see them whizzing down the aisle. It’s a busy, crowded place with loud music, kids everywhere, and people very willing to cut in line. There are also smaller grocery stores and convenience stores, and in the mall there are a few department stores, a Toys R Us, and other similar mall stores. All these stores have prices labeled, cash registers, sales—all that stuff that you might expect.
Then there are the local specialty stores. These are large, medium, and small shops that line the streets selling everything from tea sets to furniture to hardware to clothes to curtains to DVDs… There are little stores that specialize in everything school-related, books, paper, pencils, photocopies. There are stores that are just kitchen things, just painting supplies, just dairy products, just plasticware and household stuff. A few of these specialty stores you wouldn’t find in the states. One is the bakkal. That’s a little one room store that sells, well, stuff. The closest thing would be a gas station’s store. They have cigarettes, sodas, beer, candy and snacks, charcoal, newspapers, bread, lottery, and other random things. Another specialty is the firin, or bakery, where you can pick up fresh brick-oven-baked flat breads. You also have the manav, or fruit and vegetable store. For the most part, things at these stores are fixed prices, often labeled, and still not unlike what is familiar to us. One big difference that I’ve noticed is that sales people are omnipresent and helpful (too helpful?). You walk into the store, and someone says, “can I help you?” and then follows you around the whole time you are there, suggesting what you might like, pointing out the many virtues of any product you give a second glance…. Great chance to practice language, but I sometimes find the omnipresent salespeople a little overwhelming.
The last way of shopping is at the bazaar. We have one that sets up Sunday around lunch time a block away from our apartment. The vendors stay until after lunch on Monday. If you go on Sunday afternoon it’s a busy place with all the cars trying to park or drop off shoppers. If you go closer to the end on Monday, it’s a crazy place with every seller trying to out-yell the next guy and point out the virtues of his own good bargains. You can get all sorts of fruits and veggies, cheese and dairy products, fish, eggs, and some clothing and household things. Mostly people shop for veggies there. Frankly, I’m still a little iffy about buying non-refridgerated fish or eggs, but we get the most awesome oranges, sweet and cheap (+- .10$/lb). Theoretically you can bargain, although I usually head for a stall where the prices are written on a sign and pay what’s asked. I don’t see a whole lot of people bargaining anyway—if the price is too high they just go to a different stall. Ladies pull their shopping baskets behind them and stock up on everything for the week. Other guys wander around with trays of bagel-like things for sale on their head or carrying boxes of little sewing notions or gum. All in all it is quite a busy place! Yesterday we also went to a bazaar that is temporarily in the area that had all sorts of clothing, linens, toys, etc, rather than food.

It's been quite awhile since I've posted anything. We were out of town for a week, and then since we've gotten back I've been working on implementing a new language schedule and strategy and Matthew's been sick. But, in case you're looking for something interesting to browse, I've added quite a few photos from our trip to our flickr--including some impressive mountain scenery as seen from the van window. Click on the "Many Adventures..." link for the slideshow.

Valentine's Day

Valentine’s Day is coming up, so I’m hijacking this blog in honor of my husband.

Reasons I Love Mike

He’s smart. Among other things, he can listen to two lectures at the same time and follow both. He can read in three languages (working on a fourth), and has written more pages on apologetics than I can count. He reads Jonathan Edwards for relaxation.

He’s got a good sense of humor. He’s willing to laugh at himself when the occasion requires, and he’s willing to laugh in instead of get mad when I do something stupid. He makes me laugh too, and we both enjoy watching a good comedy together.

He’s romantic. He’s good at finding special places or things to do. He likes to sit and talk, sometimes for hours, over dinner after a long work day. He has good tastes in presents, restaurants, and all that stuff that goes into making a date. And he’s handsome too.

He’s strong and caring. He can open a jar when I can’t, keep me from falling on the ice, carry both our kids in from the car, pull me up the hills when we’re hiking, and he doesn't mind doing all that stuff.

He can cook. When we were first married he made one or two things better than me, but now, everything he tries his hand at he can do better than me. Salmon, steak, chicken, cinnamon pastries, French fries, French toast…

He loves God and he makes me love God more. He gets up before he has to so he can read and pray, he longs for holiness, he teaches our kids about God, and he loves—really loves—shepherding other to love and know and obey God.

I love you!

St.Peter's Church

We had our first real out-of-city daytrip yesterday. We carpooled with some friends (gas is kind of expensive, like the equivalent of about 8$ a gallon) to see some ancient sites. Now, in the US, if you want to see history maybe you head to Philadelphia to see the Liberty Bell (1776) or Colonial Williamsburg, or even Jamestown (1607). Well, we drove two hours to see the church where followers of Jesus were first called Christians. (Acts 11:25). The church is a sort of cave in the side of the hill overlooking Antakya (Antioch), complete with an escape tunnel thought to be used by early persecuted Christians.

Here’s a view of Antakya from in front of the church:

On the way to Antakya we drove past Iskenderun, which tradition states is where the large fish deposited Jonah when he was on his way to Nineveh. After Antakya, we drove about 20 minutes farther to the point the Mediterranean, where Paul and Barnabas were sent off (Acts 13:4 ). There we also did a hike to the “tunnel.” We walked through the hills to a place where a long time ago (sorry, no info plaques to read here) they carved a tunnel through the hills and build an aqueduct. Only Mike climbed down to actually see the tunnel, but here are some shots of the aqueduct. A few minutes farther along we climbed all over first century cave-tombs. Our friends (3 10-12 year old boys) counted 230+ coffin-shaped holes in the caves. Anna just enjoyed being allowed to climb around on her own two feet.

Matthew even enjoyed exploring some, although by the time this last picture was taken, both were ready to head back to the car for a nap.

Check out the slideshow link for lots of pics taken on the way back—mountain scenery and typical southern towns and villages. If you want an even better view, come visit and we'll show you around--mi casa es su casa!

In Daddy's Shoes

I found Anna like this the other day. There's probably some parenting analogy that can be made...

Pushing Anna's truck

On her own, Anna only knows how to go backwards until she crashes and gets stuck. Matthew likes to help her.

Matthew's first computer project

Language

Matthew had one of his first debates today. It was the simple two-year-old kind, and it went something like this:

“Kopek”

“Dog”

“Kopek”

“Dog”

“Kopek, kopek, kopek!”

“Dooooog!”

I’m calling it a debate and not a fight since both side were good-natured. Moreover, it wasn’t Matthew’s goal just to be obstinate; he was really trying to convince our language teacher that the animal in the picture was a “dog.” It was really cute!

Matthew and Anna both love our language tutor. She is a sweet, energetic, college grad who speaks English well. She comes over the house four (soon to be three) afternoons a week for several hours. We are working through a grammar book; we practice with her, and she corrects us and answers questions we’ve come up with in our many adventures. When she first started coming Anna warmed up right away, but as usual, Matthew wasn’t as outgoing. So, our teacher came up with the idea of bringing a sweet or a snack for him each time. At first he was just in love with the snack, but now I can honestly say both kids love her! We love her too, she’s a great teacher, explains and answers questions willingly, and even gives us her cell number in case we need help when we’re out and about.

Right now, we have 8 hours of language class a week. During most of that time the kids sleep, so both Mike and I can participate. The rest of our time we spend in self-directed study. We have several “teach yourself” books/CD’s, internet sites, etc. We watch dubbed movies, listen to the radio, and go for walks to window-shop and talk to the sales clerks. Mike joined a gym, and has some friends at a photo developing shop he can hang out with from time to time to practice-. Altogether I (Becky) am aiming for about 20 hours/week of language study. Mike is aiming for 30-40. What kinds of things can we say??? We can do greetings, weather, and all that polite stuff. Family is a favorite topic of conversation around here, plus that basic introductory stuff like where do you life, what’s your occupation, are these your kids, etc. Grammatically we’ve done quite a bit, but what’s on paper still looks better than what comes out J Really, it can be frustrating and exhilarating. Sometimes I understand exactly what is being said and know exactly how to reply or how to ask what I wonder. Other times someone says something and about all I can tell is “there must have been a verb in there…somewhere…” Actually, verbs generally come at the ends of the sentence. I’ve gotten good at identifying questions so that I don’t smile and nod at the wrong time! When I studied Spanish I found my comprehension depended quite a bit on the speaker, and it seems to be no different here. But as our teacher often encourages us, “Day by day, you will learn, you will see.”

So here are the kids enjoying their lesson-time snacks:

My two lists

(The following lists come from the mundane part of my life. I am, of course, thankful for my salvation, family, friends, etc. and miss family, friends, Pville, etc.)

I've been working on being content. Some of you know how challenging it was preparing and packing to move this far. Well, as we've settled in I've discovered how we really have everything we need here--and so much more! So my struggle to be content is certainly not because of my situation. It is because of my restless heart. God has given me eternal life, an awesome family... so many wonderful blessings! The following list is just a reminder to myself of how much God has blessed me even in "little" ways.

Things I’m Thankful For:

• That I like our furniture
• Our western toilet
• Our friendly, helpful doorman
• A dishwasher (used, but in good condition)
• The mountains on the horizon (“I will lift up my eyes to the hills…”)
• Enough clothes that it doesn’t matter when it takes them 48 hours to dry hanging in my bedroom on a cold, rainy day
• The vehicle that is available to us part-time (haven’t had to take the kids on the bus yet)
• Internet in our home
• Contact with friends and family (email, skype, etc)
• Coke is available here
• We were able to have a Christmas tree for Christmas, with lights and everything
• Our microwave (seems basic, but remember, not everyone in the world has one!)
• Our excellent, friendly, patient, language tutor who the kids love too
• Our English-speaking pharmacist and pediatrician
• Our hot-water heater (a few cold showers when we first arrived made me really thankful!)
• Salmon – when Mike broils it it’s the most wonderful thing… visit and he’ll make you some!
• Rug no-slip liner (for those of us who don’t like the floor to move beneath our feet)
• Our house church—Christian fellowship and encouraging friends
• The doner shop on the corner (think of doner as the local version of a sub)
• Electric blankets
• Awesome, cheap tomatoes and oranges available all winter
  

Things I miss:

• Listerine
• Canned pizza sauce and spaghetti sauce
• Cheap parmesan cheese
• The library
• The smell of clothes fresh out of the dryer
• Forests
• Panera Bread, Ruby T’s, Pizza Hut, Olive Garden
• Wednesday night choir
• Piano
• My Kitchen Aid mixer (although I don’t miss this as much as I thought I would)
• Red Box
• Congregational singing

Anna (aka NaNa)

My little baby is one! Ok, I know that’s old news since her birthday was Christmas Eve. But it continues to amaze me how fast she is growing, and I thought some readers may be interested in an update on life at Anna’s level. She is almost walking. She’ll stand on her own for a few seconds, and her favorite place to be is cruising the cabinets or furniture on standing on the sofa next to mommy. She also likes to find mommy, wrap her arms around mommy’s knees, and look up and say “bup, bup,” lifting one leg as if to climb up. She has been working overtime on getting teeth, I think she about to go from four to eight. The by-product is enough drool to soak several layers of clothing daily.

Her favorite foods are… just about anything. She doesn’t like potatoes or green beans. She eats anything by grabbing a handful and stuffing it in her face. She likes juice, milk and water—she’s weaned now too. Most of her words are food words, juice, cookie, more, some. She also says a sound that means “down” and “da da,” “shoes,” and “night night.” She points to things she wants, and I think she knows who “Matthew” is.

Anna prefers not to hold still. She goes everywhere, in spite of cold tile floors. Although she won’t crawl off the carpet if she’s not dressed, you better get that diaper on quick, cause she’s on her way! She loves people, strangers too. She doesn’t mind her carseat, but only likes her stroller if it’s moving and there are interesting things to watch. She likes to stand on things and “dance,” bouncing up and down. She’s something like 25^th percentile height and weight. She chases Matthew around, and makes him laugh, and he makes her laugh. She especially likes to open drawers and cupboards and find new things to play with. She likes to open the cabinet, find the cookie container, and bring it to me saying “cookie, cookie.” (Of course, her pronunciation is terrible, but you get the idea.)

She’s almost down to one nap… occasionally sleep catches up with her before naptime…

Silly and Stupid things we did in our first two months here

Sometimes being here in a whole new environment is a wonderful adventure. Sometimes is challenges us to trust God more. And sometimes it just drives us to realize how…human…we are. I wrote this list one night as I was in a good mood, laughing at the stuff we’ve done. These are mostly just things that we should have known better...but for some reason when everything around you is new and different, basic stuff can be complicated. (Names have been omitted to protect Mike's reputation).

• Told the door man “I cooked my wife”
• Told the furniture store clerk “My house is not a sofa”
• Boiled our toothbrushes until they warped and the bristles fell out
• Regularly shorted out our apts, electric and taking too long to realize that we shouldn’t be running that many things (not really that many by our standards)
• Ended up with a very high electric bill (twice what it ever was in the States, three times what we expected here) because we heated multiple rooms and left the door open (door between rooms, not door to outside
• Ordered the same wrong thing at Burger King—twice in a row
• Fried our water purifier by plugging it in to 220 outlet (in Mike’s defense, the directions said you could)
• Chewed non-chewable ibuprofen
• Ate lahmacun (a local food) with a fork and knife instead of rolling it up and eating with hands
• Washed our clothes in cold water, no spin cycle, so that after hanging out to dry forever, they were as stiff as boards (couldn’t read the washing machine labels)
• Shorted out our electricy, and then sat in the cold and dark assuming the electric in general was out (one later walked down the lit hallway, used the elevator, and made it to the street before realizing one should come back and flip the breaker)
• Failed to drain the washmachine into the bathtub, and therefore soaking the whole bathroom (we’ve done this several times)
• Left a DVD in the player we returned to the store
• Burnt tea, filled kitchen with funky smelling smoke
• Let the carrots boil over, thereby extinguishing the gas burner (catching it before the kitchen was too full of gas…)
• Poured hot grease down the sink, immediately realizing it would solidify the instant it hit the cold pipes
• Rigged a humidifier for the kids by dipping towels in almost boiling water and hanging them in front of the electric heater fan.
• Thrown away ground beef—twice—before adjusting to the reality that shelf-life here is a lot shorter

Leave a silly/stupid thing you’ve done in the comments!

For Those Hard to Reach Places

For the sacrifice holiday we just couldn't bring ourselves to sacrifice a lamb, so we decided to sacrifice our toothbrushes instead. Well, not exactly. Fearing another bout with amoebas (which thankfully never materialized), Becky thought it wise to boil our toothbrushes.

10 Steps from O.C.

12/15/2007
So here I am, sitting on my comfy sofa, watching the Christmas tree lights slowly fade in and out, and thinking about what all this is about. I have a beautiful house. It is coming together beautifully, with some planning and a lot of providence. God has blessed us here so much. This is the first time I’ve had brand-new furniture. It almost seems too nice.

But then, what’s the point? Why did I come a gazillion miles to make a cozy home here? I know the answer to that question. But what is the reality?

I worked most of the day today. I did laundry, cleaned, changed diapers, fixed meals, cooked a chicken and veggies and made them into pot-pie… I taught Matthew the nativity story, and I gave the kids baths. I checked my email and planned Mike’s Christmas present. All that is maintenance—maintaining my life, my family. I devote so much energy to these things. Do these curtains match? Find that recipe… Fold the clothes and pile them in neat little piles—again.

Finally at the end of the day I sit down to work on my real goal—the first step in the greater goal—language. I looked at the sentence, used the dictionary, conjugated the verb. “Your bag is by the bed.” Wow. I sit there and do another sentence. A page later I’m still not fluent. Really, sitting down to work on language is like standing on the Ocean City boardwalk and deciding to walk to California. Ten steps later you stop and wonder, have I gotten anywhere? Well, yes…and no. But there’s no other option than to take another step. I may never need to say, “your bag is by the bed,” but right now that sentence is my task.

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