10 Steps from O.C.

12/15/2007
So here I am, sitting on my comfy sofa, watching the Christmas tree lights slowly fade in and out, and thinking about what all this is about. I have a beautiful house. It is coming together beautifully, with some planning and a lot of providence. God has blessed us here so much. This is the first time I’ve had brand-new furniture. It almost seems too nice.

But then, what’s the point? Why did I come a gazillion miles to make a cozy home here? I know the answer to that question. But what is the reality?

I worked most of the day today. I did laundry, cleaned, changed diapers, fixed meals, cooked a chicken and veggies and made them into pot-pie… I taught Matthew the nativity story, and I gave the kids baths. I checked my email and planned Mike’s Christmas present. All that is maintenance—maintaining my life, my family. I devote so much energy to these things. Do these curtains match? Find that recipe… Fold the clothes and pile them in neat little piles—again.

Finally at the end of the day I sit down to work on my real goal—the first step in the greater goal—language. I looked at the sentence, used the dictionary, conjugated the verb. “Your bag is by the bed.” Wow. I sit there and do another sentence. A page later I’m still not fluent. Really, sitting down to work on language is like standing on the Ocean City boardwalk and deciding to walk to California. Ten steps later you stop and wonder, have I gotten anywhere? Well, yes…and no. But there’s no other option than to take another step. I may never need to say, “your bag is by the bed,” but right now that sentence is my task.