My Two Kids

Odds describe one kid, Evens the other, can you guess which is which?

1. Likes to find Daddy’s backpack and buckle the chest strap closed.

2. Kicks the ball and then falls (on purpose) to the ground since that’s what the kids on the movie do during their soccer game.

3. Refuses to eat half the cookie because Mommy didn’t give the whole cookie. Still refuses even if offered the other half, presumably since it’s now broken?

4. Intentionally taps head on elevator wall and then says, “Ooww. Look Mommy, I bonkin my ‘ead!”

5. Pushes umbrella stroller around the house until it gets wedged somewhere, then cries until Mommy rescues.

6. Points out every bus and categorizes it as big or little.

7. Barks to indicate a dog has been sighted. Or a cat. Or a cow. Or anything vaguely fuzzy (except horses, who have their own word.)

8. Seriously likes routines… “Now it time for Matthew and Anna to go get a diaper change and get some juice and go… to…” “Naps” “Yes!” Diaper, juice, kiss on forehead, and say “Night, night, no talking, no standing, no spitting [there’s a reason for that last one]”.

9. Insists on picking out own clothes. Likes to wear underwear on top of diaper.